30 September, 2007

29 September, 2007

Apply for the Red Fruit Farm

Girls, if you're looking for a new job, there's an open position as Managing Director at the Red Fruit Farm, a new branded entertainment website and competition launched in The Netherlands (but everything is in English) to promote the drink Coebergh.
Yes, it's a sexy (and rather sexist) campaign but it's a very good example of how far we are now with branded entertainment. The concept is good, but what's impressive is the work behind the site: the video and all the little tests to take to submit your application show a great attention to details (why don't you send an "e-male"?) and a significant investment in terms of budget in this online marketing project.

Letter To A Lover

I can feel the way I do when I can smell your scent and lie in anticipation waiting for a chance to press my lips to the warmth of your skin. I think of all the times and ways you’ve possessed me before but each time gives way to a biting sense of newness and a thrill I can contain only under the guise of a smile. If you could live in my space and feel what I do when you’re under my skin, you would feel the pounding of unheard sounds and the sensation of touches yet to be given.

I become lost and have to remember my body is in the world and not just in my mind; I’m taken out of myself and have to concentrate hard to get back in.

I sigh just for the sound of it and for want of a companion in my waiting. My own breath is my friend while I lie in wait for you.

My body moves in an unhurried movement and my hands seem ripe for investigation; the half light makes them seem unreal and not my own. I try to see myself as the creature you see when you look down upon me, my eyes too large and my mouth too small. I drag my nails down my thighs in punishment for not loving myself as much as I should in the instant I thought of this. If only every moment I spent I could feel what you feel when your eyes meet mine.

The 100 Unsexiest Men 2007

Enormous beer guts. Embarrassing bowl cuts. Double chins. Mullets. With all of the ugly dudes out there — like that guy with the porno mustache sitting across from you on the Green Line right now — you’d think compiling a list of the 100 unsexiest men in the world would be easy. Like Paris Hilton easy.

But when it comes to sexiness in men, there’s so much more to it than looks. (If you don’t believe that, ask yourself how at least four dog-faced wretches could all claim paternity of a Playboy centerfold’s offspring.) Yes, so much of what defines unsexiness in men is behavioral. So in addition to poring over thousands of repugnant photographs of the planet's least appealing gents, overworked researchers at the Phoenix's underground Unsexiest Laboratory had to utilize a formula that also took loathsomeness into account.

And that made things a little more difficult.

But when the smoke cleared, there was one repulsive, poorly coiffed man standing alone atop Homely Mountain. Click below to find out the undisputed winner of this year’s Golden Gilbert, the trophy named in honor of last year’s unsexy champ, Gilbert Gottfried. Our 2007 #1 was the clear winner because he is both an ugly person and an unattractive man — the worst of both worlds!

Friendly Advice

I have shelves and shelves of books full of advice on sex and relationships, but not a single one addresses it. I know why, though - because it's never been done successfully.

Okay, maybe that's not entirely true. I know at least two people who've pulled it off. They'd been friends for years. They're getting married this year.

My first experience of trying to get more friendly with a friend was ugly. It was in high school. I invited a buddy of an ex-boyfriend to the grad "just as friends." I'd been lusting after him for a while but knew his loyalty to my ex would preclude me asking him on an actual date. I figured I could play along with the "just friends" bit, then ply him with alcohol and take advantage of him. It worked (remember, kids: loyalty and alcohol don't mix), but even as we were going at it in the plush surroundings of his shag-carpeted van, I knew it was trouble. Sure enough, he regretted his actions by the sober light of day and, worse still, our friendship was never the same again. Read more >>


Show Him Your O-Face

A friend informed me of the following dilemma. I would have answered it in private and went on with my merry way, but I’m not about to look a gift question in the mouth. I’ve heard this story way too many times, and I’m taking preventative action against it coming up again:

“I’ve been having sex for the last five months with my boyfriend, and I’ve only had how many orgasms ... let me count ... Oh yeah—zero!

I mean I love him, etc., etc., but I’d like to have an orgasm at some stage. When we’re having sex I get aroused but it seems that the level of arousal is constant and it never increases during sex.

And oral sex is ... no comment. I mean I give him an “A” for effort, but he seems really overeager to please, and you can tell in his performance he just sort of dives right in and kind of goes way too fast.”

- Zilch Earth-Rockin’ Orgasms

Dear ZERO: He may be a sweetie, but he sounds like anything but in the sack. “A” for effort only goes so far. Listen, honey: The only vowel coming from our mouth should be “Oh!” Read on >>

28 September, 2007

Tenderness & Play

Sensual Lips

Sensual Lips celebrates the closer look, luscious lips, sweet, delicate details. It is in no way meant to reduce women to certain body parts.

A Painful Reminder of My Ex

My ex-boyfriend hangs from hooks. They penetrate the skin of his upper back, and he’s lifted by a rigging; there he dangles in midair, his skin stretched out like freshly pulled taffy.

I discovered this one night when I was bored and looking up old friends and lovers on MySpace. I had entered his name on a whim, not expecting anything to pop up. I had never found him on any of my previous searches and knew he tended to live below the radar: no bank accounts, credit cards or apartment leases. It was hard to believe he had even the shred of exhibitionism required to create a MySpace page. But this time, there he was. It was the first I had seen of him in nearly seven years.

His main picture was a close-up of his face, and I guessed it was one of those late-night self-portraits you barely recall the next day. He looked a little older, a few pounds heavier. His dark blond beard had gone straggly. His eyes were tired, his smile drunk. Curious, I looked at the rest of his pictures as they spread in thumbnails across the screen. One in particular caught my eye, and I clicked to enlarge it. The first thing I saw was blood.

It was late, but I called my sister anyway, letting the phone ring until I woke her. “Hello?” she breathed.

“Turn on your computer,” I said. After I directed her to his page, we sat there in silence, our phones pressed up against our ears, our breathing uneven.

“Oh, my God,” my sister said.

“Oh, my God,” I agreed. Read on >>

Deep-Voiced Men Have More Kids

If you want to have lots of kids, look for a Barry White instead of a Justin Timberlake. Men with a deep voices have more offspring, a new study suggests.

Previous studies conducted by David Feinberg of McMaster University in Canada have shown that women are more attracted to men with deeper voices, judging them to be older, healthier and more masculine than their higher-pitched rivals.

Men, on the other hand, go for women with higher pitched voices because they find them more attractive, subordinate, feminine, healthier and younger-sounding.

In the new study, detailed in a recent issue of the journal Biology Letters, Feinberg set out to see how that attraction to deeper-voiced men affected reproduction and the survival of offspring.

"While we find in this new study that voice pitch is not related to offspring mortality rates," Feinberg said, "we find that men with low voice pitch have higher reproductive success and more children born to them." Read on >>

Housework Calendar

Male Chastity Belt

Ladies, do you worry when your husband is away at work? Well fear no more! Now you can send him off with a male chastity belt. Concerned he won’t stay faithful when he hits up Vegas with the guys? If you’re back home holding the only key, you’ve pretty much eliminated all possibilities of temptation. Don’t worry gents, you can still go to the bathroom thanks to Latowski’s strategically placed holes. They’re custom fit too so your member will be as snug as a rug… even if you do happen to get aroused while away from the wife.

You can ensure your husband’s loyalty for about $1,700. And men, it’s really not as bad as it sounds. “When you slide-in, you feel as though you are imprisoned in a female sheath,” Latowski says of their product which comes in three sizes. “The small size has the smallest tube diameter. If you want to feel the counter-pressure with an erection, that would be the correct choice. For the testicles there is a separate split chamber, which provides sufficient protection from getting squeezed and cooling down.”

Tempted?

27 September, 2007

Long Distance Lovin'

The next night, my last night away from home, I emailed my lover a second set of photos. And I told him exactly what I wanted him to do with them.

"Strip in front of your laptop, baby, with my dirty photos on the screen. Stroke that beautiful cock of yours for me, and tell me how much you like my naked body," I texted cell phone to cell phone.

He obliged and begged me to give him more instructions, to make him my sex slave for the evening, to turn him into a whimpering pile of emasculated man. With those wishes firmly resounding in my mind's ear, I couldn't wait to get home and practice the same game in person. But first, I had to finish him off.

"You're such a good boy. Take good care of that beautiful cock, because I'm going to make good use of it when I get home. Now, I want you to come all over my face. Flip me over, and come on my ass."

He obeyed, and I reached a new level of sexual excitement. "Now, I want you to lick that cum off my ass. Clean my crack with the tip of your warm tongue."

I could practically feel the waves of his exploding orgasm across the miles. And I became a huge fan of long distance lovin'. Read more >>

Beefcake Calendar 08

Black & Whites

With Flowers and Bees, It Is All About Sex

I know it’s fruitless to compare the mating practices of humans—with our highly evolved means of communication (texting), sophisticated forms of romance (get ‘er drunk!), and refined ability to rise above the lustful urges of the loin (porno mags)—to the mating practices of others in the animal kingdom, but I just had to. After all, the dreaded parental talk is supposed to be about “the birds and the bees,” but why? Yes, we’re all programmed to procreate, but what can we humans possibly learn from sparrows and bumblers.

As it turns out, quite a bit. After a brief flip through my high school biology book, I realized there is a wonderfully seedy underbelly to the seemingly sterile insect world. And the hot and heavy pulsating action isn’t just reserved for insects and animals, but plants take part as well. Between the orchids and the honeybees, the basics (and then some) are covered. I’m talking threesomes, gender roles, sperm banking, S&M, transvestites, and getting a date drunk so you can have your way. That’s a lot for six legs and a couple of petals. Read on >>


As Milan fashion week begins, fashion brand Nolita has released an advertisement depicting a naked anorexic woman to highlight the effects of the illness. Written above the photo of the woman are the words: “No Anorexia”.

The photograph was shot by the controversial Italian photographer Oliviero Toscani, who in 1992 photographed a man dying of AIDS for a campaign for clothing group Benetton. Toscani’s aim was “to use that naked body to show everyone the reality of this illness, caused in most cases by the stereotypes imposed by the world of fashion”, Flash&Partners said in a statement.

Isabelle Caro, the French woman who appears in the photo, has been anorexic for 15 years, weighs 31 kg and suffers from the skin disease psoriasis. “I hid myself and covered myself up for too long,” she told Vanity Fair magazine in an interview to be published on Wednesday."Now I want to show myself without fear even though I know my body is repugnant.” Read more>>

The Latest Sexual Revolution

Why do so many teenage girls play up to the slutty, binge-drinking image promoted by lads’ mags? Whatever happened to hard-won feminism?

Teenage girls are a paradox: why is it that while they outstrip boys from primary school to university, they also outdrink the boys (girls are now officially bigger binge drinkers than boys, and their numbers are growing), dress like tarts and apparently behave like them too?

A friend told me that at her daughter’s mixed private school 15-year-old girls are giving fellatio to boys in the loos for a fiver. I heard from two different sources about girls at inner-city comprehensives performing the same act in classrooms. Time and again I hear that despite their academic achievements girls are turned off the idea of emulating their careerist mothers: instead they want nothing more than to be a Wag, or at least marry someone rich enough to support their shopping habit.

What is going on? Is the pornogrification of mainstream culture partly to blame, where even serious actresses such as Nicole Kidman and Maggie Gyllenhaal pose in their underwear for magazine and advertising shoots? A culture in which lad mags such as FHM, recently condemned for publishing a picture of a topless 14-year-old girl without her permission, are apparently sent thousands of similar pictures by girls of themselves every week. A culture in which the website of Bliss magazine (target age 14-17) invited girls to send in photographs of themselves to be marked out of 10 “on looks and pullability”. Read the full article >>

Sex Up Your Blog Life

In the 90s we all talked about sex - now we blog on it.

And this week Billie Piper appears in sexy new tv series Belle du Jour, based on hit blog Diary of a London call girl.

That Belle has caused quite a storm since she started jotting down her erotic encounters online.

Suddenly having your own sex blog is all the rage.

Every girl about town is bragging about their minxy misbehaviour.

And the best bit? You can reveal your most scandalous shenanigans without divulging your identity.

It’s a win-sin situation.

So in the name of beducation, here are the top five flirty blogs on the net right now…

Confessions of a sex writer

Scarlet magazine’s Editor at Large, Emily Dubberley is the sexpert behind this must read blog.

It’s first stop for everything new in sex-world for women.

Plus there's updates on Emily’s latest crazy escapades as a sex writer.

Erotic reviewer

McBirdie is a sex blogger for online erotic shop LoveHoney.

The girl with the double life reviews naughty toys on our behalf!

She says: “I spend my days working in mental health research and my evenings getting up to various shenanigans - most of which show up online.” Read on >>

25 September, 2007

Sexy Silhouette

Sugasm #98

This Week’s Picks
Anal, her perspective
“This entire anal sex episode had started some months earlier, on a theoretical level.”

When the Muse Wants to Fuck
“Participles, linking verbs, superlative adjectives… You want more?”

“He’s already at work, but he’s left an order behind on the scraps of ordering paper that we have all over the house.”

Mr. Sugasm Himself
The Secret Diary of a Callgirl

Editor’s Choice
Whipped on this day: 1791

More Sugasm
Join the Sugasm

23 September, 2007

Sex And Feminism

A newspaper article recently published the results of a five-year study conducted by researchers at the University of Texas on the reasons why men and women have sex. What was surprising about the study’s results, according to the study’s co-author, University of Texas clinical psychology professor Cindy Meston, was that they “refuted a lot of gender stereotypes,” particularly “that men only want sex for physical pleasure and women want love.” The study showed that men’s and women’s motivations to have sex are essentially the same; both engage in sex more due to lust than to love.

Based on the answers supplied by 444 men and women to certain questions, Meston and colleague David Buss came up with a list of 237 distinct reasons to have sex. They then asked 1,549 college students taking psychology classes to rank these reasons on a one-to-five scale, based on how these reasons applied to their experiences. The top 10 reasons to have sex for men were remarkably similar to those for women.

The top ten reasons for men are: 1. I was attracted to the person. 2. It feels good. 3. I wanted to experience physical pleasure. 4. It’s fun. 5. I wanted to show my affection to the person. 6. I was sexually aroused and wanted the release. 7. I was “horny.” 8. I wanted to express my love for the person. 9. I wanted to achieve an orgasm. 10. I wanted to please my partner.

The top ten reasons for women are: 1. I was attracted to the person. 2. I wanted to experience physical pleasure. 3. It feels good. 4. I wanted to show my affection to the person. 5. I wanted to express my love for the person. 6. I was sexually aroused and wanted the release. 7. I was “horny.” 8. It’s fun. 9. I realized I was in love. 10. I was “in the heat of the moment.”

22 September, 2007

Les Jeux Des Perles

The Open Door

You know that tune I mean. The generic cell phone ring. Not mine. And, as I found out, not his either. I opened my eyes and looked in the direction of the sound to see about seven or eight people crowded around the open bedroom door, watching us.

“For God’s Sake, Don’t stop!” she said. The girl next door was holding up her camera phone, in what I’m guess was video recording mode.

J*’s brother was grinning sheepishly at the camera. He didn’t care. So, I had a decision to make Either scramble to grab my clothes and run to the bathroom or continue doing what I came here to do, in plain site of the party. My mind whirled, the tip of his hard, thick cock still deep inside of me while everyone waited to see what we would do next. Read more >>

The Top 10 Reasons to avoid "Pregnancy & Sex"

TEN-The men who bitch that they haven't gotten laid in X days/months/years

Seriously. There are loooooooong threads started by men who haven't gotten laid in a long time asking for "help" to rekindle their sex lives. Any attempts to actually provide them with help will result in a lecture about how their wife wouldn't accept oral or any kind of sexual touch. They are only looking to bitch and commiserate with other men who aren't getting any.

NINE-The women who believe their husbands should be grossed out by delivery and never want to fuck them again.

I have one word for a man like this. Pussy. Sexyhusband will be in the delivery room (his choice), and will be counting the seconds until I can fuck him again so he can worship the pussy that not only fucks him well but just pushed his child into the world. Delivery should be a moment of awe and reverence for the power of women, not a revolting horror show that makes you never want to fuck your woman again.

EIGHT-The women who whine that their sex drive has tanked and they don't want it anymore but their awful husbands want to be sexual.

I will be the first to agree that pregnancy can do a number on your libido. However, in the event that you don't want to have intercourse, there are these things known as hand jobs and blow jobs. When those feel like too much work (or your gag reflex is feeling overly sensitive), why not read erotica to him out loud? Or tell him a sexual fantasy while he jerks off. Or even just sit there and smile and cuddle your husband while he jerks off? I realize this is shocking but there are ways to be sexually connected that don't involve intercourse. Read more >>

Naked Volunteers Needed

Hundreds of people will bare it all in South Beach on Oct. 8. Spencer Tunick, a photographer and artist of the human form, is looking for 600 to 800 people to be part of his upcoming art installation at South Beach's Sagamore Hotel that will be unveiled during Miami Beach's annual Art Basel festivities in December.

Tunick has previously photographed 18,000 naked people in Mexico City, and 7,000 people in Barcelona. The artist is looking for a range of types -- not just South Beach's famously trim models and six-pack gym bodies.

Already people are trying to take advantage of Tunick's call for nude people. There have been reports of ads on Craigslist for the installation, offering $500 and asking people to e-mail full nude pictures as a prerequisite, to a Yahoo e-mail address. Tunick said the ads are fake and suggest not responding to them, but only using the official registration site to sign up.
Read on >>

Women fight for right to bare breasts

Two female students are demanding their rights after they were banned from bathing topless at a swimming pool in Uppsala. If girls are forced to wear bikinis, boys should be too, one of the women told The Local.

Ragnhild Karlsson, 22, and her friend Kristin Karlsson, 21, live on the same corridor in a student residence in the university town. On September 5th they took a trip to the Fyrishov leisure complex, where they decided to hop in for a swim without their bikini tops.

Though the pool was full of swimmers, a female lifeguard eventually caught sight of the bare-breasted women and reached for her whistle.

"We had been swimming for a while without anybody paying us any attention when the guards called us to the side and told us to either put on a top or leave. So we left," Ragnhild Karlsson told The Local.

On Wednesday, the two women sent a letter to the Equal Opportunities Ombudsman explaining that they saw no reason for men an women to be treated differently. If anything, a bikini top could be accused of drawing unnecessary attention to a woman's breasts. Read on >>

20 September, 2007

Discovering Porn (On Your Boyfriend’s Computer)

I was innocently looking for Christmas present ideas on his computer. Literally, I was typing in “fireplace tools” in Google. And, as he turned to me and said hey, let’s watch this show together, I knew I had to quit. Me, being the Web geek that I am, immediately went to his Web history to erase my clues. That’s when I found it: a full history of porn sites. How did I know? Well, let’s just say the terms were a bit revealing. Shocked, I clicked on one. Password protected. Wow, not even just porn history, but registered porn history, credit-card-paid-subscription porn history. My stomach sank.

We have been together now for a year and a half. I recall casual conversations about this in the early days, and I’m pretty sure I asked and I’m pretty sure he denied. I remember having the “have you ever watched it with another boyfriend/girlfriend” conversation and I recall him saying yes and me saying no. I know I asked about it because my last boyfriend hid it from me, and I also discovered it, at which point he got angry, defensive, and accused me of being inadequate. So, you can see where my baggage begins. Read on >>

Faking Cybersex orgasms

“You make me so wet. I’m rubbing myself so hard. Oh my God, I’m going to come!”

If you’ve ever had cybersex in a chat room, chances are you’ve read—or written—sentences like these. Amidst mmm’s and oh yeah’s, they appear in transcripts from even the most uninspired romps. It’s not hard to understand why cybering and orgasms so often go together. Cybersex is hot; getting hot makes you want to come. For a lot of people, real-life orgasm is the only reason to have cybersex at all. With one hand on their keyboards and the other down unzipped pairs of pants, these people are the well-coordinated mutual masturbators, hunt-and-pecking steamily while they stroke.

At least, that’s the idea. The fact of the matter is though, even the words “I’m going to come” are easier to type with two hands. Which raises the question: when someone tells you they’re orgasming during cybersex, how do you know for sure? Read on >>