07 June, 2010

The 5 Most Overrated Places To Have Sex

Admit it, perv: from the age of 13 and on, you’ve banged just about everywhere you can think of, from a backyard to a boiler room on the SS Titanic. Yep, you’ve dropped precious bodily fluids in all sorts of climates and locales, all from the air conditioned and tissues aplenty wonderland of your bathroom.

Tossing off to exotic, far flung (or just downright dirty) sex is a great male tradition, born out of the subconscious scarring of the time you walked in on your parents’ sad, emotionless bed top missionary style half-thrusting. But not all sex hideaways are created equal, and some supposedly hot spots are actually pretty inconvenient and illogical. Here are five places you don’t actually want to knock boots in:

1. Car: This one makes no sense at all. People have sex in cars for one of four reasons: 1. They can’t do it in their parents house; 2. They’re cheating on someone; 3. They’re with a hooker; 4. They’re homeless. None of these things are the least bit appealing, or something to which one should aspire. And it’s not like it’s even comfortable despite its trashiness: unless you’re in a Hummer (or getting one), you’ve got precious little room to maneuver, it gets unbelievably humid, and no matter what, somebody is going to pass your car and you’re going to look like a jackass. There’s really no upside (except for, you know, getting laid). Use only when completely desperate. Read more>>

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