19 September, 2008

The Power of Rape Fantasy

It seems, on the surface, to be the most obvious “NO” for even the most open-minded, squishy-liberal, sex-positive person. Rape is a crime, a violation of a person (regardless of gender) and anyone who is aroused by sexual violence is deeply disturbed.

So why then is rape fantasy so common?

It’s so common in fact, the practice of rape “play” in the BDSM community has it’s own descriptor, the rather Harlequin Romance Novel term is “ravishment”.

The clearest line between fantasy and reality is that rape is done to a person, while rape fantasy is shared between partners. All the usual rules of safe play (talking about boundaries, limits, establishing a safe-word or gesture) make any sort of fantasy being acted out something shared as an experience and not a criminal act.

But what is the enduring power of the rape fantasy? What is it’s appeal. Is it some lingering primate fixation? Perhaps it is something ultimately taboo in a society where porn is mainstreaming and sex is far less mysterious and shadow-drenched? Is it simply a step further in the dom/sub dynamic found in almost all sexuality in some fashion?

The power of the rape fantasy is undeniable. It taps into primal fears and urges, it reduces people to urges and sweeps away concern for anything other than sexual release. In an age of increasing nuance in all things sexual, does “ravishment” serve as a big blunt instrument of sexuality? [source]


Loving Annie said...

I think because it is just in your imagination, and it is the power play game bewtween you and someone you love. Saying 'no' while someone saying they are going to have their way with you, knowing there is only someone who will give you pleasure and no pain at all, is a submissive turn on occasionally.

It is not the hurtful, abusive non-consensual, hateful, humiliating reality.

Rae said...

"Ravishment"? Hmmm, I think I like that. Yeah, a little cheesy and Harlequin romance-y, but I think (despite my having some rape-like fantasies) I get stuck on the term. I want the dominance, I want him to just "take me" and even "use me" (not that I wouldn't be getting pleasure), but the terms makes me a little ill anyway.

I like ravishment though, it sort of describes it and puts it more firmly in the fantasy realm for me.