21 January, 2008

Find your O-face

We hate the word sexpert, but on Jamye Waxman, it works. Okay, so she's more officially known as a sexologist (seeing as, unlike us, she actually has a Masters in this shit) and she's also one of the nicest people in the biz. She's a former sex educator for Babeland.com and currently writes an advice column for Playgirl Magazine. Also, in her spare time she co-wrote, directed, and hosted the "Personal Touch" Video Series for Adam and Eve Pictures and produced "Under the Covers" with adult film pioneer Candida Royalle. Her newest book is the most excellent Getting Off: A Woman's Guide to Masturbation.

E&L: What made you want to write a book about female masturbation?

JW: For starters, I love orgasms, and I love giving myself orgasms. That's one of the reasons I wanted to write this book, to let other women know it's cool to give yourself orgasms, and that sometimes the best orgasms you can get are the ones you create. I also wanted women to stop feeling ashamed or embarrassed about masturbating and to provide a really comprehensive guide to female solo sex. And I wanted to help continue the work that Betty Dodson started, and liberate masturbation for the next generation. When I started my research I realized that while I thought we had come a long way toward the acceptance of female masturbation, we still have a long way to go, and that's why I feel this book is necessary.

E&L: What do you think is the biggest myth surrounding female masturbation?

JW: That women who do it are desperate and can't find a partner. So many magazines still emphasize how to have the best! Partner! Sex! Ever! But they don't often talk about how to pleasure yourself and how good that can be and feel. I think masturbation is thought of as second-tier sex and honestly it's so not, and we need to understand that it's cool to masturbate regardless of if you're in a relationship or not, and that it's even cooler to masturbate for and with your partner. We need to understand that doing it does not make you desperate or needy or hard up, that doing it makes you more aware of your body and that helps you have better sex, whether alone,
or with a partner.

read the full interview @ Daily Bedpost

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